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Wednesday, February 17, 2010

How To Attend A Party

Rules. You gotta have'em.

As someone who's organized their fair share of shindigs over the years, I'm still surprised at how many people can't just show up and enjoy themselves.

I'm not sure what it is -- maybe it's something in the air, or the commotion... maybe the booze.

Hell, probably all three.

I dunno.

So, for those who need reminding, let's keep it simple:

When you're out in public, there's no need to be an asshat.

This is how to attend a party:

1. Be civil. Disagreements are bound to happen, but don't be a bully. If you can't agree, walk away. Don't escalate, don't berate. It's not the time or the place. Move along and enjoy your night talking to others who you can get along with. Incidentally: I'm not talking 'friendly, healthy debate' here. That's a two-way, mutually-agreed-upon, street to travel... usually far away in a corner where you can talk to each other and be heard. It's not a public shouting match or brow-beating session.

2. Be mindful. Don't force yourself on others and be respectful of their emotional, mental and physical space. --> This one comes up a lot for some reason. You can converse with someone without having a direct view up their nostril (or vice versa). Also: Just because you have one good conversation with someone does not mean you're now 'Best Buds'. Chill out. Relax. Have a good time. And, seriously, pull back on the intensity throttle. By a lot.

3. If you're not enjoying yourself: Leave. Hey, some shindigs aren't for everyone -- it happens. If it's not your gig, don't stick around and work to ruin the night for others. No one's forcing you to stay and those who are enjoying themselves don't deserve to be bothered.

That's it. Really.

The rules are incredibly simple... and yet so many can't operate under those conditions.

I dunno, maybe it's just a sign of the times that people, so emboldened by this 'say-whatever's-on-your-mind' web ideology, forget how to deal with Human beings on a polite, face-to-face basis.


I figure: Sure, say what's on your mind, but remember there's a person on the other end of your words.

But if you can't be decent and civil amongst your own kind, then it's time to go back to being by yourself.

'Cause if there's one thing I've learned over the years it's that no matter how hard you try, when you invite a bunch of people over for coffee, eventually someone's going to squat over the pot.

And that's why we have these rules:

To weed out those who'd really rather be alone anyway.


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