Updated Every Monday, Wednesday and Friday

Friday, December 30, 2011

Taking Stock 2011 Edition

This year was a big year in that one huge, life-changing event happened this past February:

The birth of my son.

Yeah, that pretty much kept me a tad busy throughout most of this year -- and yet I still managed to squeak out a few other achievements that I'm rather proud of:

-- I read through and reviewed a total of 30 TV scripts in 30 days.  I learned a metric shit-tonne about the craft of scriptwriting and also came to a deeper understanding of why I like the shows I like.

-- I put together a month-long campaign to get my now very out-of-shape self back into shape.  Over 30 days of regular hill-training (5-6 days a week) I burned a total of 32,155 calories, dropped one 1 belt size and lost 8.5 lbs.  Not too shabby.

And finally:

-- I managed to snag a Lift Out Loud reading of my Pilot script: Pipeline.

Which ended up being moderated by Chris Sheasgreen (of Less Than Kind fame)

Which piqued his interest so much that he wanted to come on board and help me take it to the next level.

I've since put together three full drafts of a pitch bible (including one Page One rewrite) and one 'Final' draft which ended up getting passed around (turns out that no, it's not 'Final' after all).

Next year we're going to refine it some more and start work on pitching this lil' beaster.

Of course in the new year I'll finally get started on writing this Doctor Who spec and I'm considering posting bits and pieces online as I go... we'll see.

Anyways, I want to give a big, hearty Thank You to each and every one of you who've made a habit of popping on by here over the past year -- especially to those of you who've tried to interact in some way, whether you took the time to find me at a party or sent me an email to talk about something I've posted, you've helped keep me engaged and I deeply appreciate it.

It's been a crazy 12 months (and I have a feeling that 2012's not going to be any less so...) but it's time to close the book on this one.

Stay safe out there folks, see you on the flip-side.

Cheers!
Brandon

Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Yeah, Don't Do That

So, a funny thing about the holidays is how quickly the slightest thing can obliterate your best laid plans.

On the bright side: Fun time with family... so... yay!

Okay, let's get back to it. On Friday I mentioned that I might try to write a blog post about 'Don't make my mistakes' when it comes to writing a pitch bible. If this turns out okay I might even consider adding it to the Newbie's Guide over there on the side (w00t! An excuse to update the guide).

Some of the notes that I received for my bible were actually things that I probably should've noticed but, thanks to being so entirely involved with the project... well, I never even noticed that something was off.

First thing, to start this post off on a positive note (as in 'do something that I actually did right'), 'Always make sure your "finished" project is read by an unbiased 3rd party -- someone who'll have no bones about looking you in the eye and say 'what is this?' or 'why is this?'. You might not always like what they have to say, but they will save your ass (and, quite possibly, your fledgling reputation with it).

As far as things to 'Do Not Do What I Did'?

Well, first thing I should point out is that many of these mistakes are completely natural and, despite your best efforts, they will find ways to creep in as you get more and more involved with your project. If you are aware of them then there's a chance that you can catch yourself in the process of making these mistakes rather than completing your project and realizing you've got a lot of weeding to do.

Mistake #1: Forgetting About The Importance Of Your Pilot.

When you're thinking about your show as a 'series' one of the most common things is to start thinking of all the things that can happen, all the stories that you can tell. Sometimes it's quite easy to get enamored with the concept or a character or even a single detail before you have an utterly compelling 'Pilot' episode. Don't do this! One of the warning signs to keep an eye out for is when you start saying (to yourself, or others) "and in the end of the season!" or "midway through the season" or (*facepalm*)"in Season Two!"

NOTE: Not that you can't work ahead, not that you can't go off and world-build to your heart's content -- just remember: NONE of what you have in your head will ever come about if you don't have an absolutely fucking mind-blowing Pilot on lock.

For a Pitch Bible you don't really need to have a whole pilot written (though it helps) but you should have an intriguing/exciting/funny synopsis that will show people what they're buying into; that will excite them for all the other things you have planned.

My mistake? Of the sample episodes that I put forth for my show, the Pilot was, by far, the weakest. Yeah, Don't Do That.

Mistake #2: Getting Lost In The Past

Yes, the other extreme to point #1. Sometimes when you're building your world and your characters you need to start giving reasons for why things are the way they are or how people know one another. Or why the sky is purple. Or why Frogs speak in Technicolor.

What can sometimes happen is this sort of feedback loop where you start explaining and justifying and explaining and justifying and creating cool ideas and events and actions... that already happened. Stuff that's already long done, stuff that holds no Drama at all because, why? It's entirely in the past.

As great as it is to have a fully living, breathing world -- one with history and depth and lots of 'fertile ground' to draw stories from -- you can't forget that this Pitch Bible is to explain 'what's happening NOW'. Where do we start from? How do these characters interact NOW?

If your most exciting stories are in your past then you've got to stop and either a) re-assess where in the timeline that you want your show to start or b) put some serious focus time into the 'Present'.

One way around this is to start extrapolating forward from past events, start using that 'fertile ground' before you get started to make some seriously strong stories and that matter NOW. (I know, sounds like 'no duh!' but... yeah you'd be surprised).

My mistake? In my earlier draft I made WAY too much back story so to counter it in my 'final' draft I cut out and re-wrote large swaths of it -- only hinting at things that I had explicitly stated earlier. It ended up backfiring as well because those who read it were like 'I don't get what happened here'. So, yes, also be aware of that little quirk as well: Cut but also be aware to leave in the essential, exciting parts too. Especially if they help to make your Character more interesting.

So.. uh... Mistake #2.5: Don't over-edit.

Finally, Mistake #3: Everyone Except Your Lead Is Interesting

This one was a huge curve-ball for me. In my head, I know my lead character, I know them cold. I know what they had for lunch that day. I know what their favorite color is and even where they like to be tickled (if they do).

And yet, somehow, what was on the page was just not ringing true, was not doing the job of SELLING them or their view-port into my world. On paper, to me, it was clear as day, made perfect sense who they were. But to my reader the response was: "Huh?"

Even if your show's a Comedy and your main character is the straight-man, they've still gotta be Interesting (yes, capital 'I' there). You've gotta sell it like no tomorrow, gotta sell that there's a real reason for this person to be THE PERSON to lead this show.

One thing I've learned to help deal with this problem is to constantly re-check your lead against every character you create. Even if they'd never meet, how would they react to each other? By playing through these scenarios you're doing more than just 'building character' you're building a vocabulary that helps you explain your character to others.

I know, that might sound weird, but I've found it rather helpful.

You know, the funny thing is that even though these mistakes seem like biggies (because I've gone and hung a lantern on them) the overall feedback about my Pitch Bible was incredibly positive. They're not Huge (well the Pilot one was a speedbump, but an easily mitigated one) but they're important to keep in mind (and have fixed) because this Pitch Bible is going to get you a MEETING with someone who will, invariably, point out these flaws (even if they don't directly realize it) by asking you questions about your world and your show.

Questions that you damn-well be ready to answer.

So, if you can, keep your head about you, avoid these kinds of mistakes and keep on banging on that keyboard (preferably not with your face).

Cheers!
Brandon

Friday, December 23, 2011

Shimmy Shimmy

Okay, so I've been busy trying to piece together all the rough bits of my 'outline' into an 'actual outline' format.

It's been... tough.

But there is progress - nothing I can share just yet, but there's progress. One of the mistakes I made was that I wasn't all that specific in some parts and I've forgotten what I meant when I wrote certain sections down. Needless to say, this has made for some interesting moments where I sit there staring at my own work, wondering 'what the hell was I thinking?'.

But hey, it's a process. A process with lots of trash-sorting and even more baby-killing (no, not actual babies).

The other point I should note here is that, normally, this whole process is usually done over about 2 weeks (if you're lucky) where (one would hope) you're devoting your day - 8 hours or more at a stretch - to figuring this out. So what's here seems like it's pretty spread out (and it is) but it's also the culmination of an hour here, 2 hours there, sort of thing for the last month or so.

Anyways, after I put the rough edit together into a document I ended up with 9 pages of crap. Okay, well, a whole lot of it is crap.

But there is some good stuff rising to the surface here.

Flecks of gold hiding in the poo. (You're welcome)

In an effort to get an idea of how a Doctor Who outline might read (because, again, we're not privy to such information) I've been making use of a rather handy little website called The TARDIS Index File - a fantastic place where a host of amazing, intelligent people have come together to fill in a host of blanks in regard to this series as a whole. Especially the parts about the series and how it breaks down.

Here's a great example of one of their episode outlines.

It's pretty amazing stuff (and a fantastic resource if you're considering writing your own Doctor Who story/spec Script).

In other news, I got my notes back for the Pipeline pitch bible and, well, they were pretty incisive. There were some flaws that I just didn't notice because I was too close to the project (this is something that perhaps I'll get into on Monday - A "Don't make my mistakes" post for the post-Christmas rush).

Oh, yeah... Christmas. Yeah, that's really coming up fast now; hard to believe that it's only 2 freaking days away (Christmas-Eve-Day starts in T-minus 2 hours).

Wow.

Alright, that's it for now. Go wrap your presents ;)

Cheers all - and have a very, merry Christmas!
Brandon

Monday, December 19, 2011

Pieces, Puzzles

Alright, so, yes. There we are, much better, all in one piece and ready to go.

Shall we?

Before we were so rudely interrupted by the sudden (and rather massive) introduction of alcohol into my bloodstream, we were working on trying to get this bloody B story into some semblance of shape.

And what do we have so far?

Well, the long and short of it - reverse-engineering the impromptu mini-outline I made last week - goes something like this:

-> Rory and Amy arrive (Rory apologetic)
--> They befriend the locals (Parents - John's the Father)
---> Earthquake/Sinkhole (Overlaps with A story)
--> They want to climb down after TARDIS, Amy gets Father to reveal secret entrance to underground cavern.
-> Amy is bothered by seeing the affection between the family
--> Amy and Rory fight (bicker, argue... uh...yell?)
---> Stop. Realize they're lost!
--> Follow glowing light to ancient alien computer terminal
-> See Doctor on computer monitor, try to communicate with him to no avail.
--> Follow after the Doctor (same general direction), round the corner - face to face with Dragon - Run for lives
---> Doctor almost talks down the Dragon - Dragon sees John with sack of her eggs. Amy takes collected eggs from John, runs past angry dragon (saving John from a nasty death).
--> Rory and Doctor return to alien terminal and work to get the cryo-cell working again.
-> Tech from TARDIS used to recharge the alien 'battery' running the cryo-cell
--> Rory finds Amy - who's tiring fast - she hands off the eggs to him, hides, lets him keep running.
---> Rory dives into the cryocell with eggs, is trapped with Dragon as doors start to shut.
--> Rory uses eggs as a distraction, dives past dragon, out the door as dragon is re-frozen.
-> All ends well, of sorts. Rory and Amy leave, have small moment on the beach 50 or so years later as the land is now a lake.

And, as far as beat sheets go, again, not too shabby.

Of course I realize I've completely forgotten to address a very important element:

What the *bleep* happens to that cavern full of eggs?

Yeah, that's a pretty large plot point to leave hanging in the air.

Now, admittedly, I went with the 'cavern full of eggs' thing for the visual impact, I could make it something more like 'a clutch of dragon eggs' if I wanted to make it easier on the 'this makes no sense' scenario.

Or I could just have everyone eat them up (not much better).

Side Note: For the Dragon noticing John with the eggs, it just came to me that the stronger way to 'notice' him would be to have him accidentally break an egg as he's trying to collect them. Hrmmm... I'll explore this further later.

Anyways, yes, the major idea now is to try and do what I did with the A plot: try to poke as many holes in this bloody thing as I can.

Ahh good times.

More to come soon,
Cheers,
Brandon

Friday, December 16, 2011

Yo Ho Ho

Okay, so I may or may not have had a few too many at the company Christmas party. Possibly imbibed a fraction more alcohol than my can be adequately processed by my liver in a timely manner.

On the bright side: I rediscovered my love/hate relationship with J├Ągermeister

(Full Disclosure: I had to Google J├Ągermeister and copy/paste the word because I forgot how to make an umlaut... It's been a long night).

Incidentally, no, I have not drank much of the stuff for, well, quite a few years.

Anyways, needless to say I'm not in much shape to blog tonight, mostly because my typing has slowed to a crawl as my perfectionist side comes out in full force.

That and it's really hard to focus right now.

Anyways, for now, I'm going to leave things as they are but wish all of you who are about to celebrate this coming Yuletide season a very merry Christmas.

For now, good night one and all. More to come.

Cheers!
Brandon

Oh! Quick update - Got some notes back on my Pipeline pitch bible (as read by unbiased strangers). They are good notes! I'm meeting with Chris on Monday night to go over them in detail and... yeah. Good news!

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Swinging For The Fences

So, now that I've got an idea for where I'm going with my B story, I can try and come up with a rough Beat Sheet for that story as well.

Again, we'll keep it simple and start with what we know.

-> Rory and Amy arrive.
-> Rory and Amy leave.

The difference between this story and our main story is that, so far, I haven't really figured out what my 'iconic moment' is going to be. I have a general idea of what I want for these characters now, but so far, I'm flying blind.

Hopefully during the course of this post something will hit me.

So, let's go with what we do know:

Amy and Rory arrive with some friction already between them, the reason why is not entirely explained off the top, but Rory is apologetic so it's easy to guess that he's done something wrong. We'll learn that this whole trip is intended to help her get her mind off of something.

Once on the planet, especially after meeting the locals -- when they burst in during dinnertime -- to see a gaunt but voracious family eating dinner (which turns out to be eggs...(!). They catch the family by surprise but, thanks to the Doctor's quick wit (and a flash of the psychic paper) the family seems to accept them readily enough. (The Doctor is smart enough to not say that he's with the Government).

During this time, while the Doctor is interacting with children (2 boys and a little girl, who mob him), Amy and Rory talk up the father (John) -- a wide-eyed, excitable man who gets very cagey when they notice bits of iridescent shells laying around.

More rumbling, an earthquake (that odd muffled roar is back)?? The house starts to creak around them. Everyone runs outside to see the ground crack and shift then give way, collapsing into a sinkhole, taking the TARDIS down with it.

Amy and Rory suggest climbing down but there's no ladder and it's too steep - The father admits he knows of a small cave that leads down into a cavern, it's where he was getting the eggs. But there's something more, something that Amy manages to tease out of him: There's something down there. Something big. And angry.

This, of course, excites the Doctor, sending him off toward the cave.

John collects his family, hugs his children and wife, and heads off after the Doctor. Watching this moment seems to have a big effect on Amy, she shakes it off and stalks off after them with Rory taking up the rear.

Once in the cavern Rory and Amy begin discussing the event and her feelings (in her classicly blunt style). She knows that her daughter grows up fine, knows that all ends well... but she still wants her daughter back. She can't believe that he would even suggest giving up the search. This is where Rory makes his case - if they were meant to find her, they would have and they'd know it. He doesn't want to give up either, but he sees what the search is doing to her... and he doesn't want to lose her too.

The sounds of roaring and screaming shake them from their moment - and they realize that they're completely lost. They've been walking and talking all this time and they're lost in these carved catacombs.

In the distance they notice a faint glowing light and decide to move toward it - eventually ending up at an primitively ornate computer. Old tech, very, very old tech that still works but whomever created this terminal obviously revered the tech as some sort of Deity. The lights are faint, the power waning. Through some sort of screen they see the Doctor run into a large room, frantically scanning computers.

They try to figure out some way to get the tech to work so they can contact him but to no avail.

They leave the terminal and round the corner to find themselves face-to-face with the Dragon. There is much screaming. The Doctor runs out of an alcove and runs past them - acknowledging them only briefly before saying something akin to 'you should run now'. Everyone runs, the dragon is hot on their heels.

Finally, back at the main cavern, the Doctor spins - spooking the Dragon enough that it skids to a stop (too cartoonish?) - he goes into his speech, almost wins the Dragon over. Amy and Rory spot John with an armful of eggs -- and Amy clicks on what's been going on (hrmmm... not sure about that one...). The Dragon sees John and becomes enraged.

Amy pushes John out of the way, takes the eggs from him and runs past the stunned dragon (yelling to the Doctor to 'figure something out, fast' as she passes him and the Dragon follows). The Doctor and Rory fly into action the both of them heading back to the cryo-cell - trying to get it operational again (need to re-charge the battery).

Doctor and Rory go to the TARDIS, get (galactic jumper cables...?) and use it on the computer's power core. Doctor sends Rory off to find Amy (who's tiring fast). She hands off the eggs to Rory, who keeps running (as she hides in an alcove with the Dragon rushing past). Rory runs with the eggs, heading back into the cell - the Dragon dives in after him, seemingly blocking the entrance.

Amy arrives, having found the Doctor, out of breath. She watches in horror as Rory is in the room with the Dragon. Frantic, she tries to find some way to communicate with him, hits some of the buttons -- the doors begin to close, preparing to seal the Dragon in (this might be a bit too dumb for Amy to do... will revisit later).

Rory uses the eggs, tosses them to the Dragon, distracting it just long enough for him to slide through the dragon's legs and dive out the door, moments before it closes.

The door seals, the dragon is re-frozen.

Epilogue

Amy comes to realize that there are some things that are just out of her control entirely - the Dragon awoke alone, lost, trapped underground... and then some strange little creature started stealing its eggs (babies...? Too on the nose...? hrmm). Though she desperately wishes to have her child back, to be able to hold her and be the proper parent, she knows that River lives and grows up into a strong woman. She's not happy, but she accepts the consolation. (This will probably not have any dialogue and will mostly be an internal decision... not sure how much though just yet.)

End of episode, they arrive on the lake 50 years later for their day at the beach, a nice day in the sunshine.

Hrmmm... and there we are. Okay, not quite a 'beat sheet', not quite an outline... and yet, well, not too bad for a rough draft.

On Friday let's give this thing another go, see if we can't clean some things up a tad (as there's obviously quite a bit here that could use a spit polish/overhaul).

Not too shabby though, if I do say so myself.

More to come!
Brandon

Monday, December 12, 2011

Places Everyone

Okay, so yeah... wow, the holiday season is coming up fast, eh? I'd like to say that I've managed to get all my shopping done, but... yeah... no.

People are just incredibly hard to shop for.

In other news, the B story is starting to firm up a tad. I'm not sure exactly how it's going to play out just yet, but I can talk a bit about some abandoned ideas.

One of the first things I considered doing was to have Amy and Rory befriend the mother of this family, a woman who's lived this incredibly hard life and lost a few kids of her own along the way. I liked the idea of examining how this woman manages to keep on keeping on despite the fact that her kids, well, yeah, they died.

Note: this, of course, ended up being quite a dark take on things -- though it had a nice centre of 'feel-good-ness' for the companions in that they know that their child is still alive (hell, they know her pretty well as an adult).

Needless to say, that one ended up falling by the wayside pretty quick.

Though it did end up inspiring me to look into the idea of them befriending someone else in the family - at first the little girl (who's 9) but I felt that it might be a bit too 'on the nose' seeing as, well, they lost a daughter.

So I started asking myself a) who can they best relate to? and b) who's actually going to be able to take part in this story with them? (someone's going to have to climb down into the catacombs with them).

Which then lead me to another realization about series six: there was a bit of a common thread about fathers and their children -- how they ended up having to rise above their own weaknesses to prove themselves as fathers.

Which lead me down the thought process of 'What is Amy and Rory's state of mind coming into this story?' (Yes, my mind makes leaps like that sometimes).

Which lead me to start thinking: Where is the conflict between Rory and Amy coming in this episode, that's going to drive them forward?

Which lead me to this: Rory wants to give up searching. He rationalizes it by saying that they know that their daughter survives and grows up well. There's no use getting worked up, running all over the galaxy -- time says that if they were going to find her, they would find her. But they don't.

This, of course, does not sit well with Amy - she's not the kind to give up and even through Rory's coming from a place where he thinks he's trying to help his wife... yeah, it doesn't go over well.

ALL THAT SAID: How does one incorporate that into the story? I can't be spending time revealing back story, BUT, now that I know this, I can start with that event already happened. The fight already done long before they land in Iowa -- with Rory trying to make amends.

Hrmmm...

So what's the point of this for them? To reaffirm Amy's belief to never give up?

Well, I'm not entirely sure that that's the most effective arc (it's certainly the most expected). Thing is, if you watch the rest of the season, Amy barely mentions the fact that her infant daughter has been taken from her -- in fact, for the most part, she seems to have made her peace with it.

So that's where I can take this. Though, this story isn't about proving anyone 'right' or 'wrong', it's about knowing when you've done all you can, knowing when to let go.

We always like to bandy about these phrases like 'winners never quit' and such but the reality is that there are just some things that are infinitely larger than we are, some things that, no matter how much you 'just do it' you're never going to punch your bare hand through 16 feet of solid Titanium.

And there's a strength in knowing our limitations, knowing when to say 'enough is enough', being able to stand tall, dust yourself off and move on -- stronger and more prepared for the next fight.

I know this all sounds pretty dark, and yeah, I can see how easily it can go that way -- but, that said, hopefully I can balance it out effectively; balance enough light with that dark that it's not some overwhelming, downbeat thing. (Which, honestly, is what it's sort of feeling like to me... like I might be digging myself in too deep).

That said, I remember hearing somewhere that we 'work best when we push ourselves outside of our comfort zones'.

Huh. Well, sounds like it's worth a shot to me.

Let's giv'r a go.

Cheers all!
Brandon

Wednesday, December 07, 2011

A Running Leap

So now that I've got a rough road map laid out for my A story, the time has come for me to figure out what my B story is going to be.

The good news is that in Doctor Who one of the most common things that happens is that the Doctor and his companions end up getting separated - which means there's a pretty clear delineation between A and B stories.

So why try and reinvent the wheel? That bit of formula works well, let's roll with it.

But how will that work?

In the part of the season that we're going to be straddling here, Amy and Rory have just had their child taken from them by an alien cult (who they plan to raise into a living weapon to kill the Doctor). They then learn that their mysterious, time-travelling friend River Song is actually their daughter, all grown up and heading backwards in time as they're moving forward (her future is their past, etc).

One of the things that really bothered me about this series was that, all things aside, we never actually witness Rory and Amy coping with the loss of their child -- something that is just rife with Drama and story and all sorts of things... but that thread never really got touched.

I'd like to tug on that thread a tad.

The problem is that when you're writing a spec script there's only so much room you have to start involving backstory. That room shrinks considerably when it's also not the focus of the story. And that's definitely something to keep in mind when weighing the scales -- especially considering that only a handful of people will ever really know what you're talking about anyway.

Which leaves me with a decision to make:

Tell the story I want to tell.

Keep the storyline and find a way to make it not be about Amy/Rory losing their baby -- but leave enough subtext that fans of the show will understand.

Find another story that's episodic in nature but still reflects the theme.

Now one part of the story that I haven't really explored much is this group of people, these locals -- this small town, which most likely will be shrunk to a small farm - maybe a family... (since it's more thematically similar).

Maybe the B story is actually about this small family that's starving in the middle of the Great Depression, their mom and pop fighting to make sure their kids are taken care of.

Damn, this is getting into some heavy shit.

Hrmmm, I'm going to have to think on this some more, try to figure out what the strongest angle is.

More to come.

Cheers!
Brandon

Monday, December 05, 2011

Outline Part 6

--> Doctor figures out who the Dragon is and who the aliens were.

When I was first working on this premise, I was planning on getting the Silurians into the mix somehow -- actually my Dragon was going to be a Silurian Devil God. One minor problem with the idea was the whole idea of bringing in the mythology, how to integrate it smoothly for those who've never seen the show before (let alone integrate it for those who are fans).

Then I had a conversation with my friend/editor Cameron - who introduced me to an interesting piece of information: those who are writing a spec script for the show are actually forbidden from using the established species/races. You've gotta make your own aliens. Once you're working on the show proper, then you're allowed to play with the locals.

That said I'm semi-abandoning my Silurian idea here. My race will be called the Ordovites, they're a now-extinct space-faring race that tried to make Earth their homeworld back at the height of the Silurian empire. Needless to say, the Silurians - with their crazy advanced technology - promptly went about obliterating them.

The Doctor realizes that this creature is a Queen of the species and quite possibly the last of her kind. The cell where the creature was imprisoned was some sort of laboratory that kept the creature in stasis for all this time -- running tests, collecting data. Over time this place was forgotten and now the batteries have started to wear out -- which allowed her to wake up: leaving her alone, scared and very, very pissed off.

---> Doctor Who Faces Down the Dragon.

Armed with the knowledge that he's gleaned from the test chamber and hearing the terrified screams of his cornered companions, the Doctor runs out to attempt to save the day. He calls out the Dragon, causing it to turn on him - where he explains that he is the Doctor and that he knows the unspeakable things that have been done to her. He understands her rage. Her feelings of violation and loss. He reveals that she is the last of her kind and then offers her a chance to start anew, start fresh - to get free of this world. He offers her hope.

--> Recapture Dragon

The Doctor seems to be making progress, the Dragon seems calmer, placated. But then the Dragon sees the locals with armfuls of her eggs, carrying them away. She becomes enraged and goes after the locals - the Doctor realizes he has few options left and so he sets an elaborate trap, blinding her with rage until she chases him into the cryo-cell once more. With a last-second dive through the doorway, the cell closes and re-traps the dragon. Freezing it stasis. The Doctor re-powers the battery, ensuring another several millennia of safe slumber.

-> Doctor Who Leaves

As the Doctor and his companions begin to leave, the locals say their goodbyes, cowed by this experience. The Doctor and his friends, leave just as rain begins to fall from the sky.

Jump forward 50 years

The area is now a lake, the Doctor steps out into a bright, sunny day, to where people play happily along the beach/lakeside. Beneath the lake, the Dragon slumbers, its eye twitching as it dreams its icy dreams.

End of episode.

And there we are. The first, rough outline complete for my A story. It took a bit longer than expected and I can already see some things I'd like to change/make better... but, hey, progress! (right?!)

That's all for now, folks!

More to come!

Cheers,
Brandon

Friday, December 02, 2011

Outline Part 5

Alright! So here we are, trying to get this together - the big confrontation.

So they find the TARDIS and realize that they're now in the heart of the Dragon's home.  The Doctor is busy scanning bones.  In the background, something stirs.  The locals arrive, their arms laden with eggs and stand, frozen in terror.

The Doctor picks up a skull, trying to identify the species, saying that the bones aren't that old.  More shifting in the background.  The locals drop the eggs and then

--> The Locals run away

The Doctor notices the locals running, realizes that he's alone. (Note: Idea - B Story could involve the companions getting lost in the tunnels...?) He pauses, stiffens as he hears a sound behind him.  He turns to see:

---> A large CLAW on top of the TARDIS - HUGE DRAGON bears down on him

The 3-eyed creature roars, and rears up, wings spread wide.  The Doctor instinctively draws his sonic screwdriver and points it up at the beast -- nothing appears to happen.  He fiddles with the settings but gives up as the Dragon lunges toward him.  The Doctor decides to:

--> Run!

While running though the caves, the Doctor starts to notice odd little bits of wiring and metallic panels peeking out from the rock.  He continues to run, however, as the Dragon continues its chase.  As he comes to a fork in the cave system, he heads toward a tunnel that has flickering lights emanating from it.  He charges into the tunnel to see that it's a dead end.  The Doctor:

-> Discovers the remnants of ancient tech - a giant cryogenic prison cell

He notices that the Dragon has given up chase, in fact, he runs back to the entrance just in time to notice the Dragon storming away.  He returns to the metallic cell - this giant chamber and starts to pore over the technology, scanning it, amazed that it's still working -- though only barely.  Whatever's keeping this place running, it's finally started to run out of juice.  He pieces together that this is a prison cell -- the dragon's prison cell.  More importantly:

--> Doctor figures out who the Dragon is and who the aliens were.

But that's something we can get into on Monday when I finish this first draft off all proper-like ;)

Until then!

Brandon